Parenting tip –
Accept your child’s limitations:-
“Children need love, especially when they don’t deserve it”- Harold Hulbert.
As a teenager, I remember once after school I made evening supper for my family. I placed a slightly burned bread and tea in which I forgot to add sugar (yes, indeed) in front of my parents. After a long tiring day at the office both my parents patiently picked the toast and eat every bite and sipped tea with great pleasure. I was stunned! I even tried to apologize but they valued my efforts. I was very happy, later at night when I asked them if they really liked the toast and sugarless tea they happily admitted that my food like life is full of imperfections and flaws but accepting others limitations/faults and choosing to remain happy is what family is all about. If our parents can easily accept our flaws why can’t we as a parent do the same? To accept your kid’s weaknesses you have to identify them first and gradually try to work on it (whenever possible). Here is a chart that will help you:-
a. Start with positive: –
List at least five positive strengths of your child:-
Strengths 1 2 3 4 5
Ways to enhance/strengthen them even more
Similarly, list their limitations:-
Weaknesses 1 2 3 4 5
Ways to overcome/convert them into positive ones
P.S:- While stating their limitations do consider the factors which are beyond your and their control like disabilities, external environment, skin, etc. Be practical and realistic.
In the first chart, list your child’s positive traits, qualities, competencies, skills, abilities you admire and want to further hone their capabilities. In the second one, mention the negative ones which need improvement and changes. By doing so you can identify how, when, with whose help it can be done.
Accepting them and their weaknesses make them ‘real’ and ‘unique’ in their own way which helps in discovering inner peace and their self-esteem and confidence. Recognizing their weaknesses doesn’t mean giving up. I only mean we have to accept those weaknesses which are beyond anyone’s reach but can always grow and learn and improve on traits which can be converted into positive ones.
Don’t forget to-
End each day by asking yourself and your kid, “What made us most happy today?” or “What am I most thankful about today?” I am sure many times the answers to these questions are all simple things that made our day special. Your duty as a parent is to find something positive about each day (even if you’re child didn’t have a good day). This practice will surely help you to identify the small pleasures of life. Teach them the significance of pity things. Many times we don’t appreciate the things we have and get caught up looking for luxurious/ expensive things that we fail to appreciate simple things that money cannot buy. Simple things in life sometimes aren’t really simple. Many times they become the reason for our happiness, in fact, these pity things give us more happiness than big pleasures. Life’s little pleasures together like enjoying sunrise/sunset, doing household chores, baking a cake, cooking your child’s favourite food, enjoying Sunday or any holiday breakfast in bed, walking on a beach, dancing/ singing together, reading a book together, playing with them (any indoor or outdoor games), listening to music, watching yours or their favorite T.V show are just a few examples of simple life’s pleasure that will matter the most in future.
Small suggestion – Avoid having too many toys for your child. More Toy= Less Joy.